Ekblad 'can't wait' to return from 20-game suspension for Panthers in Game 3

TAMPA -- Just after 11 a.m. on Thursday, Aaron Ekblad was sitting in his locker stall loosening the laces on his skates. While the rest of the Florida Panthers had come and gone from that morning's skate, while the visitors dressing room had been prepared for that night's Game 2 against the Tampa Bay Lightning, Ekblad had nowhere to be.

"I'm doing nothing," he said.

Seven hours later, the rest of the Panthers would take the ice at Amalie Arena for Game 2 of the Eastern Conference First Round against the Lightning -- a game they would win 2-0 to take take a 2-0 lead in the best-of-7 series -- but Ekblad would not be with them.

As he did for Game 1, the longtime Panthers defenseman spent the game in a room off this dressing room, alone, watching on a TV screen. It's what he prefers, instead of being up in the press box, allowing him to focus on the action on the ice, without distractions.

It is bittersweet.

"It was great because we won," Ekblad said of Game 1. "It would have been a whole lot worse if we had lost, knowing that I could have been out there helping. They're doing great. I just hope to be another piece of the puzzle, like I have been the last two years."

On March 10, the NHL announced that Ekblad had been suspended 20 games, without pay, for violating the terms of the NHL/NHLPA Performance Enhancing Substances Program. The timing was such that Ekblad was slated to miss the final 18 games of the regular season plus the first two games of the Stanley Cup Playoffs.

He is eligible to return for Game 3, set for Saturday at Amerant Bank Arena (1 p.m. ET; FDSNSUN, SCRIPPS, MAX, truTV, TBS, SN, TVAS).

"It's going to be a big boost," defenseman Dmitry Kulikov said. "He's a guy that plays a lot of minutes and plays against top lines. Really solid player. Without him in the lineup we had to go through different rotations, different pairings. But everybody can step up and play big minutes. We have the people in the room that can fill this role and that's what we've been doing."

When the suspension was announced, Ekblad released a statement through the NHL Players' Association expressing "shock" that he had failed a random drug test.

"Ultimately, I made a mistake by taking something to help me recover from recent injuries without first checking with proper medical and team personnel," the statement read. "I have let my teammates, the Panthers organization and our great fans down. For that, I am truly sorry. I have accepted responsibility for my mistake and will be fully prepared to return to my team when my suspension is over. I have learned a hard lesson and cannot wait to be back with my teammates."

That time is now.

"My motivation to return from an injury was pure, in a sense," he added this week. "And that's all it was. I'm not one that's going to beat myself up. I forget plays faster than anybody on this team, I guarantee it. I've played many games and made lots of bad plays and tons of good ones. I barely remember the good ones. I definitely don't remember the bad ones.

"It's a move on [from] mistakes kind of League and I've made plenty of them. I'll continue to make plenty of mistakes as a man, as a husband, and hopefully a father one day. And that's life."

Ekblad occupies a unique place in Panthers history. He was the No. 1 pick in the 2014 NHL Draft and is the second-longest tenured player, behind captain Aleksander Barkov. He's an alternate captain and has been a constant for an organization that has undergone a tremendous amount of change since Bill Zito was hired as general manager in 2020.

The top-pair defenseman had 33 points (three goals, 30 assists) in 56 games this season.

He will find himself right back there, on the top pairing, when he returns Saturday. His body feels good now, strong, ready. He has not played since March 8, an eternity.

That he feels this way rankles, eats at him. He would so much rather be battered and bloody.

"Every playoff game is like 10 regular-season games in the sense of how your body feels," Ekblad said. "So, I don't expect to feel good for long, even though I feel good now. That's kind of like the way you feel at the beginning of the regular season: It's like, 'Oh, I had this whole summer to rest and relax.'

"But at the end of the day it takes one game and one hit to get right back in the fight. I want to feel as [crappy] as possible as quick as possible. That's exactly what this team is all about. Embrace the [crap], embrace that feeling and doing it together until it's all done.

"I can't wait for it."

It is, as he put it, "part of our DNA as a team."

At the moment, though, he feels good, fresh. As coach Paul Maurice said, "Aaron's probably in the best shape of his life right now."

It's partially how he got through.

In the initial days after the suspension, Ekblad tried to keep himself busy, tried to make the days go as fast as possible. He filled every hour of every day, playing round after round of tennis, plenty of golf, and returning to the rink to skate and work out for 4-5 hours a day, but only at off hours when he would not come into contact with the team.

He watched games, analyzing the movements of, say, defenseman Seth Jones at the point on the power play or the way defenseman Gustav Forsling got pucks through to the net, anything to make himself better for his return.

Anything to keep his mind spinning. He didn't want to sit at home and think. If he never stood still, that helped.

Ekblad always has been good at letting go, at not beating himself up about the bad, about not reveling in the good. It has stood him in good stead over the past couple of weeks.

"I'm a pretty positive and optimistic person," he said. "I don't care what happened. I don't care now. It is what it is. People that know me, know me, and I know myself, so it's not something that I dwell on. Obviously having a million more dollars in my bank account would be nice. But that's life and it doesn't change anything for me.

"I would trade every single one of those dollars to go back and play all those games and be in a better situation than I am now. Perspective-wise, I have a great life, I have great teammates, great friends, a great family. So I have no …"

Ekblad stopped himself and corrected.

"Plenty of regrets," he tried again. "No issues with how everything's gone."

He made a mistake. He is not arguing that.

"Obviously I went down a path that I shouldn't have," Ekblad said. "At the end of the day, it was still a shock to me. I had no idea that it would happen. I think in life you have to own up and take responsibility and ownership of the things that you do and that's what I tried to do as quickly as possible so that I could be in this situation and come back and help my team in the playoffs. There was no fighting the situation."

So here he is now, on the brink of a return. He will make a return to hockey, to the playoffs, to the game he has loved and played his whole life. But there is another return that will take longer.

On that, he is still working.

"You have to face the consequences of your actions, even if it's not intended," Ekblad siad. "So, you eat it. You move on.

"It takes a lifetime to earn respect and a moment to lose it. And that's what I'm going to be doing the remainder of my career and my life, is earning that respect back."